Part 41

THE latter having well the project weighed, Now changed his plan, and other schemes surveyed; Proposed within himself revenge to take, With less parade:--less noise it then would make, And better fruit the action would produce, Than if he were apparently profuse. Said he to Alice, go and seek his wife; To her relate the whole that caused our strife; Minutely all from first to last detail; And then the better on her to prevail, To hasten here, you'll hint that you have fears, That Andrew risks the loss of--more than ears, For I have punishment severe in view, Which greatly she must wish I should not do; But if an ear-maker, like this, is caught, The worst of chastisement is always sought; Such horrid things as scarcely can be said: They make the hair to stand upon the head; That he's upon the point of suff'ring straight, And only for her presence things await; That though she cannot all proceedings stay, Perhaps she may some portion take away. Go, bring her instantly, haste quickly, run; And, if she comes, I'll pardon what's been done.

WITH joy to Andrew's house fair Alice went; The wife to follow her appeared content; Quite out of breath, alone she ran up stairs, And, not perceiving him who shared her cares; Believed he was imprisoned in a room; And while with fear she trembled for his doom; The master (having laid aside his arms) Now came to compliment the lady's charms; He gave the belle a chair, who looked most nice:-- Said he, ingratitude's the worst of vice; To me your husband has been wondrous kind; So many services has done I find, That, ere you leave this house, I'd wish to make A little return, and this you will partake. When I was absent from my loving dear, Obligingly he made her babe an ear. The compliment of course I must admire; Retaliation is what I desire, And I've a thought:--your children all have got The nose a little short, which is a blot; A fault within the mould no doubt's the cause, Which I can mend, and any other flaws. The business now let's execute I pray, On which the dame he took without delay, And placed her near where Andrew hid his head, Then 'gan to operate as he was led.

THE lady patiently his process bore, And blessed her stars that Andrew's risk was o'er That she had thus the dire return received, And saved the man for whom her bosom grieved. So much emotion William seemed to feel, No grace he gave, but all performed with zeal; Retaliated ev'ry way so well, He measure gave for measure:--ell for ell. How true the adage, that revenge is sweet! The plan he followed clearly was discrete; For since he wished his honour to repair:-- Of any better way I'm not aware.

THE whole without a murmur Andrew viewed, And thanked kind Heav'n that nothing worse ensued; One ear most readily he would have lost, Could he be certain that would pay the cost. He thought 'twould lucky be, could he get out, For all considered, better 'twere no doubt, Howe'er ridiculous the thing appears, To have a pair of horns than lose his ears.

THE RIVER SCAMANDER

I'M now disposed to give a pretty tale; Love laughs at what I've sworn and will prevail; Men, gods, and all, his mighty influence know, And full obedience to the urchin show. In future when I celebrate his flame, Expressions not so warm will be my aim; I would not willingly abuses plant, But rather let my writings spirit want. If in these verses I around should twirl, Some wily knave and easy simple girl, 'Tis with intention in the breast to place; On such occasions, dread of dire disgrace; The mind to open, and the sex to set Upon their guard 'gainst snares so often met. Gross ignorance a thousand has misled, For one that has been hurt by what I've said.

I'VE read that once, an orator renowned In Greece, where arts superior then were found, By law's severe decree, compelled to quit His country, and to banishment submit, Resolved that he a season would employ, In visiting the site of ancient Troy. His comrade, Cymon, with him thither went, To view those ruins, we so oft lament. A hamlet had been raised from Ilion's wall, Ennobled by misfortune and its fall; Where now mere names are Priam and his court; Of all devouring Time the prey and sport.

O TROY! for me thy very name has got Superior charms:--in story fruitful spot; Thy famed remains I ne'er can hope to view, That gods by labour raised, and gods o'erthrew; Those fields where daring acts of valour shone; So many fights were lost:--so many won.

BUT to resume my thread, and not extend Too much the subjects which our plan suspend; This Cymon, who's the hero of our tale, When walking near the banks that form the dale Through which Scamander's waters freely flow, Observed a youthful charmer thither go, To breathe the cool refreshing breeze around; That on its verdant borders oft she'd found. Her veil was floating, and her artless dress, A shepherdess seemed clearly to express. Tall, elegantly formed, with beauteous mien, And ev'ry feature lovely to be seen, Young Cymon felt emotion and surprise, And thought 'twas Venus that had caught his eyes, Who on the river's side her charms displayed, Those wondrous treasures all perfection made.

A GROT was nigh, to which the simple fair, Not dreaming ills, was anxious to repair; The heat, some evil spirit, and the place, Invited her the moment to embrace, To bathe within the stream that near her ran; And instantly her project she began.

THE spark concealed himself; each charm admired; Now this, now that, now t'other feature fired; A hundred beauties caught his eager sight; And while his bosom felt supreme delight, He turned his thoughts advantages to take, And of the maiden's error something make; Assumed the character, and dress; and air; That should a wat'ry deity declare; Within the gliding flood his vestments dipt: A crown of rushes on his head he slipt; Aquatick herbs and plants around he twined: Then Mercury intreated to be kind, And Cupid too, the wily god of hearts; How could the innocent resist these arts?

AT length a foot so fair the belle exposed, E'en Galatea never such disclosed; The stream, that glided by, received the prize; Her lilies she beheld with downcast eyes, And, half ashamed, herself surveyed at ease, While round the zephyrs wantoned in the breeze.

WHEN thus engaged, the lover near her drew; At whose approach away the damsel flew, And tried to hide within the rocky cell; Cried Cymon, I beneath these waters dwell, And o'er their course a sov'reign right maintain; Be goddess of the flood, and with me reign; Few rivers could with you like pow'rs divide; My crystal's clear: in me you may confide; My heart is pure; with flow'rs I'll deck the stream, If worthy of yourself the flood you deem; Too happy should this honour you bestow, And with me, 'neath the current, freely go. Your fair companions, ev'ry one I'll make A nymph of fountains, hill, or grove, or lake; My pow'r is great, extending far around Where'er the eye can reach, 'tis fully found.

THE eloquence he used, her fears and dread; Lest she might give offence by what she said, In spite of bashfulness that bliss alloys, Soon all concluded with celestial joys. 'Tis even said that Cupid lent supplies; From superstition many things arise.

THE spark withdrew, delighted by success; Return said he:--we'll mutually caress; But secret prove: let none our union learn; Concealment is to me of high concern; To make it publick would improper be, Till on Olympus' mount the gods we see, In council met, to whom I'll state the case; On this the new-made goddess left the place, In ev'ry thing contented as a dove, And fully witnessed by the god of love. Two months had passed, and not a person knew Their frequent meetings, pleasure to pursue. O mortals! is it true, as we are told, That ev'ry bliss at last is rendered cold? The sly gallant, though not a word he said, The grot to visit now was rarely led.

AT length a wedding much attention caught; The lads and lasses of the hamlet sought, To see the couple pass: the belle perceived The very man for whom her bosom heaved, And loudly cried, behold Scamander's flood! Which raised surprise; soon numbers round her stood, Astonishment expressed, but still the fair, Whate'er was asked, would nothing more declare, Than, in the spacious, blue, ethereal sky, Her marriage would be soon, they might rely. A laugh prevailed; for what was to be done? The god with hasty steps away had run, And none with stones pursued his rapid flight: The deity was quickly ought of sight.

WERE this to happen now, Scamander's stream Would not so easily preserve esteem; But crimes like these (whoever was abused), In former days, were easily excused. With time our maxims change, and what was then, Though wrong at present, may prevail agen. Scamander's spouse some raillery received; But in the end she fully was relieved: A lover e'en superior thought her charms, (His taste was such) and took her to his arms. The gods can nothing spoil! but should they cause A belle to lose a portion of applause, A handsome fortune give, and you'll behold, That ev'ry thing can be repaired by gold.

A CONFIDANT WITHOUT KNOWING IT; OR THE STRATAGEM

NO master sage, nor orator I know, Who can success, like gentle Cupid show; His ways and arguments are pleasing smiles, Engaging looks, soft tears, and winning wiles. Wars in his empire will at times arise, And, in the field, his standard meet the eyes; Now stealing secretly, with skilful lure. He penetrates to hearts supposed secure, O'erleaps the ramparts that protect around, And citadels reduces, most renowned.

I DARE engage, two fortresses besiege Leave one to Mars, and t'other to this liege. And though the god of war should numbers bring, With all the arms that can his thunders fling, Before the fort he'll vainly waste his time, While Cupid, unattended, in shall climb, Obtain possession perfectly at ease, And grant conditions just as he shall please.

I NOW propose to give a fav'rite tale:-- The god of Love was never known to fail, In finding stratagems, as I have read, And many have I seen most nicely spread.

THE young Aminta was Gerontes' wife, With whom she lived, it seems, a wretched life. Far better she deserved than what she had, For he was jealous, and his temper bad: An aged hunks, while she was in the hour When hearts, that never felt LOVE'S mighty pow'r, Are presently by tender objects caught, Which ne'er before had entered in the thought.

WHEN first Aminta saw young Cleon's face, A lad possessing all engaging grace, Much prudence then she ev'ry way displayed, E'en more perhaps than necessary made. For though we may suppose the lovely fair, Would ev'ry effort use to 'scape the snare, Yet when the god of soft persuasion takes The fatal moment, havock soon he makes, In vain his duty, any thing opposed, If once the tender sentiment's disclosed. Aminta consolation had in view 'Twas that alone the passion from her drew, A meeting innocent, to vent her tears, And, to a feeling friend, express her fears. 'Tis represented thus I cannot doubt; But sight of meat brings appetite about; And if you would avoid the tempting bit, 'Tis better far at table not to sit.

AMINTA hoped to render Cleon kind; Poor innocent! as yet to dangers blind, These conversations she was led to deem, Mere friendly ways that raised sincere esteem; And this alone she ardently desired, Without supposing more would be required, Or any thing improper be the case: She'd rather die than suffer such disgrace. 'Twas difficult the business to commence; A letter 's often lost, or gives offence, And many serious accidents arrive: To have a confidant 'twere better strive; But where could such a female friend be found? Gerontes dreaded was by all around. I've said already, Cupid will obtain, One way or t'other, what he wants to gain; And this will show the observation just The maxim's such as you may always trust.

A FEMALE relative young Cleon had, A peevish prude, who looked upon the lad, As one she had a right to rule and scold; Her name was Mistress Alice: sour and old.

ONE summer's day, Aminta to her said: I cannot think how 'tis, your cousin's led, (Though quite indifferent he is to me, And doubtless such will ever prove to be) With various fond attentions, to pretend, He loves me--much beyond a common friend. My window oft he passes day and night; I cannot move a step, but he's in sight, And in a moment at my heels appears; Notes, letters full of soft expressions, dears, To me are sent by one I will not name, For known to you, she would be thought to blame: Pray put an end to such a wild pursuit It nothing can produce but wretched fruit; My husband may take fire at things like these; And as to Cleon.--me he'll never please; I'll thank you to inform him what I say; Such steps are useless: folly they betray.

MUCH praise Aminta from the dame received; Who promised that the conduct, which aggrieved; To Cleon she would mention, as desired, And reprimand him, as the fault required: So well would scold him, that she might be sure, From him in future she would be secure.

THE foll'wing day our youth to Alice came; To pay a visit solely was his aim; She told him what Aminta had declared, And, in her lecture, words by no means spared. The lad, surprised, on oath the whole denied, And vowed to gain her love, he never tried. Old Alice called her cousin, imp of Hell; Said she, in all that's wicked, you excel; You will not all your base designs confess; The oaths are false on which you lay such stress, And punishment most richly you deserve; But false or true, from this I will not swerve, That you should recollect, Aminta 's chaste, And never will submit to be disgraced; Renounce her from this hour; no more pursue:-- That easily, said Cleon, I can do; Away he went: the case considered o'er; But still the myst'ry he could not explore.