Part 4

NOW IF HE CAN ONLY HANDLE THAT MEETING AS HE DOES CONGRESS WE NEED HAVE NO FEAR OF THE RESULT,

You know a lot of people think he is liable to be too easy with them dont you believe it he can be pretty stern when he wants to remember last fall when he sent Germany their Questionaire, Said GIVE ME YOUR REAL NAME AND PERMANENT ADDRESS,

Lets hope the Turkish Deligation dont bring all their WIVES or we never will get PEACE,

And lets make those Russians shave before they sign up we want to know who we are dealing with,

If Ireland sends a deligation I can hear France say bring us back war,

Now the Pres says we are going to recognize the CZECHO SLOVAKS we may recognize them but we will never pronounce them,

That Nation has caused Readers more trouble than any other one in war,

They cant make the Peace terms much worse than those Armistace terms for they read like a 2nd mortgage, Party of the second part has no more chance than a Democrat in the next Congress,

We are handicapped at this meeting, England and France both have their Prime Ministers there while BILLY SUNDAY dident go for us,

Each Nation is supposed to share in the Peace terms according to what they have done in the war, Holland gets the KAISER, Mexico the CROWN PRINCE,

Now the Pres has to get back here before Mar 1st when the Country goes in into the hands of the Republicans or they are liable to want to charge him a tarriff to get in again,

OF COURSE WE DONT RECEIVE MUCH NEWS OF THE PEACE CONFERENCE. FIRST FEW WEEKS THEY ARE ALL JUST COMPLIMENTING EACH OTHER. WAIT TILL THEY GO TO DIVIDE UP SOMETHING. (What a truth that turned out to be)

Well by this time Congress was getting pretty rough so Pres W grabbed his boat and commuted back home,

Said I think I will land in BOSTON the old Pilgrim Fathers had pretty fair luck, and nobody has ever landed there since,

Germany couldent figure out how America could get troops over there and get them trained so quick they dident know that in our manual there is nothing about RETREATING and when you only got to teach an Army to go one way you can do it in half the time,

I feel pretty proud over that last little gag, As I used it before Pres Wilson in Washington and he repeated it in his Boston speech, Saying "as one of our AMERICAN HUMORISTS says," Up to then I had only been an ordinary Rope thrower,

Pretty tough when the Pres cops your act,

Pres had pretty good luck on that 1st trip they saw his 14 points and raised him -------- ---- more

Says in there, "There is to be no more wars" and then there was a Paragraph a little further down told you where to get your AMMUNITION in case there was one,

Now he come's back to Washington to explain the LEAGUE OF NATIONS to Congress You know those guys cant read anything and understand it,

But after eating out of 15 million dollar Gold Plates and hobnobbing with Kings and Dukes can you imagine how Congress looked to him when he come back,

Had All the Senators up to dinner at White House Took Ham Lewis three days to dress for it,

Not much news from the Dinner Burleson copped the Phones,

On last day went up to Capitol to sign all the bills Congress had passed Well after he had signed the bill,

Then he went before Congress and balled out the WILFUL 37, he was busier than Mcadoo with a new train,

HE and Taft both spoke on same stage first time Pres and x-pres ever agreed,

I still wanted to go along but he said: "wait Will till some other trip and I will take you,"

You know 13 is his lucky number if they dont sign this up on this trip he knows they will on his 13th trip,