Part 47

The Frog's Fiasco

by D. K. Stevens

There was once a Frog In a lonesome Bog With a voice that was well worth praising. He had one song and it used to go Way down in the added lines below Like this: [Symbol: music] which is quite amazing.

So he said one day In a casual way "Although it is scarcely vital And I may be wrong, it appears to me That a frog with a voice like mine should be First class in a Song Recital."

So he posted sheets In the village streets With the date and the price: one shilling; And he billed himself "Signor" because He thought he would get immense applause By the aid of a little frilling.

Well, it came about That his friends turned out From the Crane to the Curious Cricket, With the Hare and the Hedgehog, Coon and Fox, And the Critical Owl in a private box, (On a Complimentary Ticket.)

When the clock struck eight Signor Frog in state Thus opened the exhibition: "For my first attempt on the concert-stump I shall render a song that is called 'Ger-rump.' An original composition."

Then the Critical Owl With a guttural growl, Or a noise which was something near it, Stood up and observed: "All summer long From dusk till day you have sung that song-- And why should we pay to hear it?"

So they all marched out In a regular rout, With remarks most decidedly chilling, And every one, as he passed the stand Where the Muskrat kept all the cash in hand, Demanded and got his shilling!

And the luckless Frog, In the lonesome Bog, Relapsed into deep dejection; As he broods alone on his dismal case And sings all night in a booming bass, "Ger-rump" is his one selection.

The Musical Trust

By D. K. Stevens

There was once a man who could execute "Old Zip Coon" on a yellow flute, And several other tunes to boot, But he couldn't make a penny with his tootle-ti-toot Tootle-ootle-ootle--tootle-ti-toot! Tootle-ootle-ootle--tootle-ti-toot! Though he played all day on his yellow flute, He couldn't make a penny with his tootle-ti-toot.

One day he met a singular Quaint old man with a big tuba, Who said: "I've travelled wide and far But I haven't made a penny with my oom-pah-pah." Oom-pah! Oom-pah! Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah! Oom-pah! Oom-pah-pah! Though he played all day on his big tuba He couldn't make a penny with his oom-pah-pah.

Then they met two men who were hammering On a big bass drum and a cymbal thing, Who said: "We've banged since early spring And we haven't made a penny with our boom-zing-zing." Boom-zing! Boom-zing! Boom-zing-zing! Boom-b-b-boom-boom--zing-zing! Though the banged on the drum and the cymbal thing They couldn't make a penny with their boom-zing-zing.

So the man with the flute Played tootle-ti-toot, And the other man he played oom-pah, While the men with the drum and the cymbal thing Went: boom-b-b-boom-boom--zing-zing! And they travelled wide and far. Together they made the welkin ring With a Tootle-ootle! Oom-pah! Boom-zing-zing! Tootle-ootle! Oom-pah! Boom-zing-zing! Tootle-ootle! Oom-pah! Boom-zing-zing! And Oh! the pennies the people fling! When they hear the tootle-oom-pah-boom-zing-zing!

Katherine Maynadier Browne

The Cautious Cat

by D.K. Stevens

A Cautious Cat And a Reckless Rat Went to sea with an Innocent Lamb. They sailed in a yawl With nothing at all To eat but a Sugar-cured Ham. The wind blew high In a sky-blue sky, At a rate they had never foreseen. The wind blew low, And the wind also Blew a little bit in between-- Just a little bit in between.

Said the Cautious Cat To the Reckless Rat, Likewise to the Innocent Lamb: "We'll tack this smack And sail right back To send a Mar-coni-o-gram. For the winds might blow Both high and low And I wouldn't care a Lima Bean, But I never can sail When the ocean gale Blows a little bit in between-- Just a little bit in between.

"Of course with me You will never agree," Said the Cat to the Rat and the Lamb, "But if you balk You will have to walk,-- That's the kind of kitten I am!" So they sailed right back On the larboard tack To the nearest port of call, And the Reckless Rat Let it go at that, While the Lamb said nothing at all-- Said nothing--whatever--at all.

Katherine Maynadier Browne

THREE LITTLE BEARS

BY M. C. McNEILL

Three little bears came into the town. "How do you do?" said everybody. Their faces were smiling, with never a frown. "How sweet!" said everybody. The three little bears made three little bows. "How very polite!" said everybody. They bowed as boys bow in dancing-school. "What airs and what grace!" said everybody.

One little bear had a little red coat. "How smart!" said everybody. One had a tippet all made of soft down. "How cozy and warm!" said everybody. And one was a fiddler of great renown. "What charming music!" said everybody.

The three little bears began then to dance. "How cute!" said everybody. "What do you want, you little black bears With manners so nice?" said everybody. "I don't like to be a fool, so I want to go to school," Said the red-coated bear to everybody.