Part 10

Intercepted

"Only the worst of them vote." "Are not the suffragists frights?" "Nietzsche's the person to quote." "I prefer love to my rights."

"Are not the suffragists frights?" "Sex is their only appeal." "I prefer love to my rights." "No, we don't think, but we feel."

"Sex is their only appeal." "Woman belongs at the loom." "No, we don't think, but we feel." "Doesn't it rub off the bloom?"

"Woman belongs at the loom." "Isn't the speaker a bore!" "Doesn't it rub off the bloom?" "Oh, it's a fad--nothing more."

"Isn't the speaker a bore!" "Nietzsche's the person to quote." "Oh, it's a fad--nothing more." "Only the worst of them vote."

The Universal Answer

Oh, there you go again, Invading man's domain! It's Nature's laws, you know, you are defying. Don't fancy that you can Be really like a man, So what's the use of all this fuss and trying? It seems to me so clear, That women's highest sphere Is being loving wives and patient mothers. Oh, can't you be content To be as you were meant? {souls For {books belong to husbands and to brothers. {votes

Candor

(By an admirer of the late H.C. Bunner.)

"I know what you're going to say," she said, And she stood up, causing him some alarm; "You're going to tell me I'll lose my charm, And what is a woman when charm has fled? And you're going to say that you greatly fear I don't understand a woman's sphere; Now aren't you honestly?" "Yes," he said.

"I know what you're going to say," she said, "You're going to ask what I hope to gain By stepping down to the dusty plain, By seeking a stone when I might have bread; You're going to say: 'Can a vote replace The tender force of a woman's grace?' Now, aren't you honestly?" "Yes," he said.

"I know what you're going to do," he said, "You're going to talk to me all day long Trying to make me see I'm wrong; And other men who are less misled Will pale with jealousy when they see The time you give to converting me; Now, aren't you honestly?" "Ye-es," she said.

What Every Woman Must Not Say

"I don't pretend I'm clever," he remarked, "or very wise," And at this she murmured, "Really," with the right polite surprise. "But women," he continued, "I must own I understand; Women are a contradiction--honorable and underhand-- Constant as the star Polaris, yet as changeable as Fate, Always flying what they long for, always seeking what they hate." "Don't you think," began the lady, but he cut her short: "I see That you take it personally--women always do," said he. "You will pardon me for saying every woman is the same, Always greedy for approval, always sensitive to blame; Sweet and passionate are women; weak in mind, though strong in soul; Even you admit, I fancy, that they have no self-control?" "No, I don't admit they haven't," said the patient lady then, "Or they could not sit and listen to the nonsense talked by men."

Chivalry

It's treating a woman politely As long as she isn't a fright: It's guarding the girls who act rightly, If you can be judge of what's right; It's being--not just, but so pleasant; It's tipping while wages are low; It's making a beautiful present, And failing to pay what you owe.

From Our Own Nursery Rhymes

"Chivalry, Chivalry, where have you been?" "I've been out seeking a beautiful queen." "Chivalry, Chivalry, what did you find?" "Commonplace women, not much to my mind."

Women

(With rather insincere apologies to Mr. Rudyard Kipling.)

I went to ask my government if they would set me free, They gave a pardoned crook a vote, but hadn't one for me; The men about me laughed and frowned and said: "Go home, because We really can't be bothered when we're busy making laws."

Oh, it's women this, and women that and women have no sense, But it's pay your taxes promptly when it comes to the expense, It comes to the expense, my dears, it comes to the expense, It's pay your taxes promptly when it comes to the expense.

I went into a factory to earn my daily bread: Men said: "The home is woman's sphere." "I have no home," I said. But when the men all marched to war, they cried to wife and maid, "Oh, never mind about the home, but save the export trade."

For it's women this and women that, and home's the place for you, But it's patriotic angels when there's outside work to do, There's outside work to do, my dears, there's outside work to do, It's patriotic angels when there's outside work to do.

We are not really senseless, and we are not angels, too, But very human beings, human just as much as you. It's hard upon occasions to be forceful and sublime When you're treated as incompetents three-quarters of the time.

But it's women this and women that, and woman's like a hen, But it's do the country's work alone, when war takes off the men, And it's women this and women that and everything you please, But woman is observant, and be sure that woman sees.

Beware!