THADDEUS. I'm too tired to go out now; wait till mornin'.
Did I tell ye that old man Reed saw three Southern troopers pass his house this mornin'?
MARY [takes coffee pot from stove, crosses to bench, fills pot with water]. I wish them soldiers would git out o' the neighborhood. Whenever I see 'em passin', I have t' steady myself 'gainst somethin' or I'd fall. I couldn't hardly breathe yesterday when the Southerners came after fodder. I'd die if they spoke t' me.
THADDEUS. Ye needn't be afraid of Northern soldiers.
MARY [puts coffee pot on stove]. I hate 'em all--Union or Southern. I can't make head or tail t' what all this fightin's 'bout. An' I don't care who wins, so long as they git through, an' them soldiers stop stealin' our corn an' potatoes.
THADDEUS. Ye can't hardly blame 'em if they're hungry, ken ye?
MARY. It ain't right that they should steal from us poor folk. [Lifts a huge gunny sack of potatoes from the table and begins setting the table for breakfast, getting knives, forks, spoons, plates, cups, and saucers--two of each--from the cupboard.] We have hard 'nough times t' make things meet now. I ain't set down onct to-day, 'cept fer meals; an' when I think o' the work I got t' do t'morrow, I ought t' been in bed hours ago.
THADDEUS. I'd help if I could, but it ain't my fault if the Lord see'd fit t' lay me up, so I'm always ailin'. [Rises lazily.] Ye better try an' take things easy t'morrow.
MARY. It's well 'nough t' say, but them apples got t' be picked an' the rest o' the potatoes sorted. If I could sleep at night it'd be all right, but with them soldiers 'bout, I can't.
THADDEUS [crosses to right; fondly handles his double-barrelled shot-gun]. Jolly, wish I'd see a flock o' birds.
MARY [showing nervousness]. I'd rather go without than hear ye fire. I wish ye didn't keep it loaded.
THADDEUS. Ye know I ain't got time t' stop an' load when I see the birds. They don't wait fer ye. [Hangs gun on wall, drops into his chair, dejectedly.] Them pigs has got to be butchered.
MARY. Wait till I git a chance t' go t' sister's. I can't stand it t' hear 'em squeal.
THADDEUS [pulling off his boots, grunting meanwhile]. Best go soon then, 'cause they's fat as they'll ever be, an' there ain't no use in wastin' feed on 'em. [Pause, rises.] Ain't ye most ready fer bed?
MARY. Go on up.
An', Thad, try not t' snore to-night.
THADDEUS [reaching the landing]. Hit me if I do. [Disappears from view.]
SERGEANT [to THADDEUS; not unkindly]. Sorry, my friend, but you were so darn slow 'bout openin' the door, that we had to walk in. Has there been a Northern soldier round here to-day?
THADDEUS [timidly]. I ain't seed one.
SERGEANT. Have you been here all day?
THADDEUS. I ain't stirred from the place.
SERGEANT. Call the rest of your family down.
THADDEUS. My wife's all there is. [Goes to foot of stairs, and calls loudly and excitedly.] Mary! Mary! Come down right off.
SERGEANT. You better not lie to me or it'll go tough with you.
THADDEUS. I swear I ain't seed no one.
THADDEUS. Say, Mary, you was h----
SERGEANT. You keep still, man. I'll question her myself. [To MARY.] You were here at the house all day?
MARY [with difficulty]. Y-e-s.
Washington Square Plays · The Wunder Library — complete classics, free to read, with narration.