Part 62

"Why, dear, there really seem to be two problems. Delivering the mail that has accumulated, and insuring that it doesn't accumulate in the future. Perhaps you could burn the backlog, and throw away all incoming mail for a while."

"Burn! Throw away! Mother, Zeus would be furious! Besides, what if I burned Cupid's arrows? Athena and I might never be united!"

Nevertheless, he thought about his Mother's words. And thought of a brilliant solution to the first problem.

"Sire, we need to implement a two step process. First, we deliver all the outstanding mail. Second, we streamline the existing system to insure we don't again arrive at our present situation again."

"Fine, I like that. Do it!" Zeus seemed very agreeable.

"Well, yes, Sire. By the way, I'll need the services of Mercury."

"Of Mercury! He's my private messenger! How dare you! How long will you need his services? Ridiculous! When can I have him back? And how do you propose to use him?"

"We'll loan him to the Post Office Department. He'll distribute the backlog quickly and easily, and then we have only the second problem to solve."

Zeus frowned, then finally agreed.

Mercury's transfer to the Postal Department was delayed. Not because he objected; rather, because of the normal bureaucratic delays. Eventually the paperwork was completed and the transfer made.

The results were astounding. Within a day half of the backlog was distributed. It seemed that the initial problem was well on its way to being solved.

Appearances are deceiving!

On the second day the mail distribution once more failed. And Cupid had not yet received his arrows!

Demo hurried to talk to the Postmaster.

"What has happened? Where is Mercury? The mail is once more piling up!"

"No problem. It'll all be delivered in time. As for Mercury, he was ruining the morale of our normal deliverers. I really couldn't tolerate that, so I placed him in another department. He is currently acting as our censor. Keeps his eye open for anything that might be controversial. Why, he just found a package of arrows! Never should have let them get into the system. Directed to a Mr. Cupid, on Zeus' staff. Might well have been an attempted assassination planned!"

"Arrow? Cupid?" Demo's eyes brightened. "Ah, where are they? What did you do with them?"

"Turned them over to security. Right now they are rounding up this Cupid character. It'll go hard with him, I assure you!"

The arrest of Cupid created a furor on Olympus. Zeus was nonplused. Hera, horrified! Venus, however, was the practical mother. "Zeus, you must go his bail. I know it is high. Still, I am sure there are some celestial bailbondsmen who'll cover it for a fraction of the total amount."

Reluctantly Zeus provided the gold.

The problem still remained. Find the arrows!

Demo rushed to Hades, where The Great Detective, better known as TGD, a detective of somewhat dubious character had established office. "Sir, you are famous for the divorce cases you have supported, for the furtive tracing of vanished criminals - indeed, for tracking down lost people and lost items. Your skills are badly needed in support of Zeus!"

TGD smiled. "I am pleased that Zeus has need of me. I would be better pleased if he were to allow me to relocate my office to Olympus. However, for a reasonable fee, I shall be glad to locate the arrows."

"The arrows? How did you know? Well, yes, the arrows must be found. The world is approaching a level of desperation never seen before."

"Great! Then my price shall be adjusted accordingly. Now, where were they last seen? In whose hands? What was the intended disposition by that person?"

"Come, boy, just the facts. Don't waste my time.

Though taken aback, Demo quickly supplied the information.

"We must act quickly! The game, to plagiarize, is afoot. Hand me my cape, my cap, and yonder cane. Been at this too many years, you know. Eh, my pipe, also, if you please."