Part 1

Transcribed from the 1919 Harper and Brothers edition by David Price, email ccx074@pglaf.org

THE PURSUIT OF THE HOUSE-BOAT

BEING SOME FURTHER ACCOUNT OF THE DOINGS OF THE ASSOCIATED SHADES, UNDER THE LEADERSHIP OF SHERLOCK HOLMES ESQ.

BY JOHN KENDRICK BANGS AUTHOR OF “A HOUSE-BOAT ON THE STYX,” ETC.

ILLUSTRATED

LONDON AND NEW YORK HARPER AND BROTHERS 45, ALBEMARLE STREET, W. 1919

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FOURTEENTH IMPRESSION

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CONTENTS

CHAP. PAGE I. The Associated Shades take Action 1 II. The Stranger Unravels a Mystery and Reveals 19 Himself III. The Search-Party is Organized 42 IV. On Board the House-Boat 58 V. A Conference on Deck 73 VI. A Conference Below-Stairs 89 VII. The “Gehenna” is Chartered 105 VIII. On Board the “Gehenna” 121 IX. Captain Kidd Meets with an Obstacle 139 X. A Warning Accepted 157 XI. Marooned 172 XII. The Escape and the End 189

ILLUSTRATIONS

“The Stranger drew forth a bundle of business Frontispiece cards” “Dr. Johnson’s point is well taken” 8 “What has all this got to do with the question?” 10 “Poor old Boswell was pushed overboard” 22 “Three rousing cheers, led by Hamlet, had been 42 given” “A black person by the name of Friday finds a 54 bottle” Madame Récamier has a plan 66 The hard features of Captain Kidd were thrust 70 through “Here’s a kettle of fish!” said Kidd 74 “Every bloomin’ million was represented by a 84 certified check, an’ payable in London” Queen Elizabeth desires an axe and one hour of her 90 olden power “The committee on treachery is ready to report” 102 “You are very much mistaken, Sir Walter” 108 “In the dead of night he had stolen quietly up the 118 gang-plank” Shem in the lookout 128 Judge Blackstone refuses to climb to the mizzentop 126 Captain Kidd consents to be cross-examined by 148 Portia Kidd’s companions endeavouring to restore 154 evaporating portions of his anatomy with a steam-atomizer “He told us we were going to Paris” 160 “You are a very clear-headed young woman, Lizzie,” 170 said Mrs. Noah “That ought to be a lesson to you” 178 “The pirates made a mad dash down the rough, rocky 180 hill-side” “Now, my child,” said Mrs. Noah, firmly, “I do not 192 wish any words” “A great helpless hulk ten feet to the rear” 200

THE ASSOCIATED SHADES TAKE ACTION

THE House-boat of the Associated Shades, formerly located upon the River Styx, as the reader may possibly remember, had been torn from its moorings and navigated out into unknown seas by that vengeful pirate Captain Kidd, aided and abetted by some of the most ruffianly inhabitants of Hades. Like a thief in the night had they come, and for no better reason than that the Captain had been unanimously voted a shade too shady to associate with self-respecting spirits had they made off with the happy floating club-house of their betters; and worst of all, with them, by force of circumstances over which they had no control, had sailed also the fair Queen Elizabeth, the spirited Xanthippe, and every other strong-minded and beautiful woman of Erebean society, whereby the men thereof were rendered desolate.

“I can’t stand it!” cried Raleigh, desperately, as with his accustomed grace he presided over a special meeting of the club, called on the bank of the inky Stygian stream, at the point where the missing boat had been moored. “Think of it, gentlemen, Elizabeth of England, Calpurnia of Rome, Ophelia of Denmark, and every precious jewel in our social diadem gone, vanished completely; and with whom? Kidd, of all men in the universe! Kidd, the pirate, the ruffian—”

“Don’t take on so, my dear Sir Walter,” said Socrates, cheerfully. “What’s the use of going into hysterics? You are not a woman, and should eschew that luxury. Xanthippe is with them, and I’ll warrant you that when that cherished spouse of mine has recovered from the effects of the sea, say the third day out, Kidd and his crew will be walking the plank, and voluntarily at that.”

“But the House-boat itself,” murmured Noah, sadly. “That was my delight. It reminded me in some respects of the Ark.”

“The law of compensation enters in there, my dear Commodore,” retorted Socrates. “For me, with Xanthippe abroad I do not need a club to go to; I can stay at home and take my hemlock in peace and straight. Xanthippe always compelled me to dilute it at the rate of one quart of water to the finger.”

“Well, we didn’t all marry Xanthippe,” put in Cæsar firmly, “therefore we are not all satisfied with the situation. I, for one, quite agree with Sir Walter that something must be done, and quickly. Are we to sit here and do nothing, allowing that fiend to kidnap our wives with impunity?”

“Not at all,” interposed Bonaparte. “The time for action has arrived. All things considered, he is welcome to Marie Louise, but the idea of Josephine going off on a cruise of that kind breaks my heart.”

“No question about it,” observed Dr. Johnson. “We’ve got to do something if it is only for the sake of appearances. The question really is, what shall be done first?”

“I am in favor of taking a drink as the first step, and considering the matter of further action afterwards,” suggested Shakespeare, and it was this suggestion that made the members unanimous upon the necessity for immediate action, for when the assembled spirits called for their various favorite beverages it was found that there were none to be had, it being Sunday, and all the establishments wherein liquid refreshments were licensed to be sold being closed—for at the time of writing the local government of Hades was in the hands of the reform party.

“What!” cried Socrates. “Nothing but Styx water and vitriol, Sundays? Then the House-boat must be recovered whether Xanthippe comes with it or not. Sir Walter, I am for immediate action, after all. This ruffian should be captured at once and made an example of.”

“Excuse me, Socrates,” put in Lindley Murray, “but, ah—pray speak in Greek hereafter, will you, please? When you attempt English you have a beastly way of working up to climatic prepositions which are offensive to the ear of a purist.”

“This is no time to discuss style, Murray,” interposed Sir Walter. “Socrates may speak and spell like Chaucer if he pleases; he may even part his infinitives in the middle, for all I care. We have affairs of greater moment in hand.”

“We must ransack the earth,” cried Socrates, “until we find that boat. I’m dry as a fish.”

“There he goes again!” growled Murray. “Dry as a fish! What fish, I’d like to know, is dry?”