Part 18

Know. I know him to be a swearer, a liar, a Sabbath-breaker; I know him to be a fornicator and an unclean person; I know him to be guilty of abundance of evils. He has been, to my knowledge, a very filthy man.

Clerk. But where did he use to commit his wickedness? in some private corners, or more open and shamelessly?

Know. All the town over, my lord.

Clerk. Come, Mr. Tell-True, what have you to say for our Lord the King against the prisoner at the bar?

Tell. My lord, all that the first witness has said I know to be true, and a great deal more besides.

Clerk. Mr. Lustings, do you hear what these gentlemen say?

Lust. I was ever of opinion that the happiest life that a man could live on earth was to keep himself back from nothing that he desired in the world; nor have I been false at any time to this opinion of mine, but have lived in the love of my notions all my days. Nor was I ever so churlish, having found such sweetness in them myself, as to keep the commendations of them from others.

Then said the Court, ‘There hath proceeded enough from his own mouth to lay him open to condemnation; wherefore, set him by, gaoler, and set Mr. Incredulity to the bar.’

Incredulity set to the bar.

Clerk. Mr. Incredulity, thou art here indicted by the name of Incredulity, (an intruder upon the town of Mansoul,) for that thou hast feloniously and wickedly, and that when thou wert an officer in the town of Mansoul, made head against the captains of the great King Shaddai when they came and demanded possession of Mansoul; yea, thou didst bid defiance to the name, forces, and cause of the King, and didst also, as did Diabolus thy captain, stir up and encourage the town of Mansoul to make head against and resist the said force of the King. What sayest thou to this indictment? Art thou guilty of it, or not?

Then said Incredulity, ‘I know not Shaddai; I love my old prince; I thought it my duty to be true to my trust, and to do what I could to possess the minds of the men of Mansoul to do their utmost to resist strangers and foreigners, and with might to fight against them. Nor have I, nor shall I, change mine opinion for fear of trouble, though you at present are possessed of place and power.’

Then said the Court, ‘The man, as you see, is incorrigible; he is for maintaining his villainies by stoutness of words, and his rebellion with impudent confidence; and therefore set him by, gaoler, and set Mr. Forget-Good to the bar.

Forget-Good set to the bar.

Clerk. Mr. Forget-Good, thou art here indicted by the name of Forget-Good, (an intruder upon the town of Mansoul,) for that thou, when the whole affairs of the town of Mansoul were in thy hand, didst utterly forget to serve them in what was good, and didst fall in with the tyrant Diabolus against Shaddai the King, against his captains, and all his host, to the dishonour of Shaddai, the breach of his law, and the endangering of the destruction of the famous town of Mansoul. What sayest thou to this indictment? Art thou guilty or not guilty?

Then said Forget-Good: ‘Gentlemen, and at this time my judges, as to the indictment by which I stand of several crimes accused before you, pray attribute my forgetfulness to mine age, and not to my wilfulness; to the craziness of my brain, and not to the carelessness of my mind; and then I hope I may be by your charity excused from great punishment, though I be guilty.’

Then said the Court, ‘Forget-Good, Forget-Good, thy forgetfulness of good was not simply of frailty, but of purpose, and for that thou didst loathe to keep virtuous things in thy mind. What was bad thou couldst retain, but what was good thou couldst not abide to think of; thy age, therefore, and thy pretended craziness, thou makest use of to blind the court withal, and as a cloak to cover thy knavery. But let us hear what the witnesses have to say for the King against the prisoner at the bar. Is he guilty of this indictment, or not?’

Hate. My lord, I have heard this Forget-Good say, that he could never abide to think of goodness, no, not for a quarter of an hour.

Clerk. Where did you hear him say so?

Hate. In All-base Lane, at a house next door to the sign of the Conscience seared with a hot iron.

Clerk. Mr. Know-All, what can you say for our Lord the King against the prisoner at the bar?

Know. My lord, I know this man well. He is a Diabolonian, the son of a Diabolonian: his father’s name was Love-Naught; and for him, I have often heard him say, that he counted the very thoughts of goodness the most burdensome thing in the world.

Clerk. Where have you heard him say these words?

Know. In Flesh Lane, right opposite to the church.

Then said the Clerk, ‘Come, Mr. Tell-True, give in your evidence concerning the prisoner at the bar, about that for which he stands here, as you see, indicted by this honourable Court.’

Tell. My lord, I have heard him often say he had rather think of the vilest thing than of what is contained in the Holy Scriptures.

Clerk. Where did you hear him say such grievous words?

Tell. Where?—in a great many places, particularly in Nauseous Street, in the house of one Shameless, and in Filth Lane, at the sign of the Reprobate, next door to the Descent into the Pit.

Court. Gentlemen, you have heard the indictment, his plea, and the testimony of the witnesses. Gaoler, set Mr. Hard-Heart to the bar.