SECTION II.. _of Parties and Amusements._

Of Parties and Amusements.

We shall have but few things to say upon the manner of conducting one's-self in a party, for we should only repeat the advice we have already given as respects propriety in the carriage of the person, in visits, and in conversation.

If a gentleman enters a drawing-room where there are more than ten persons, he should salute all generally, by a very respectful inclination of the head, and present his respects first to the lady of the house, but converse at first only with her husband; gentlemen usually stand in groups, while the ladies sitting, answer the salutation by a similar one; we should remark that the ladies do not rise, except in saluting one of their own sex.

However distinguished a person may be, we do not allow conversation to be disturbed by their coming. They listen for a few moments while observing what persons are present, then mingle in the conversation, without pretending at all to monopolize it. When conversation is not general, nor the subject sufficiently interesting to occupy the whole company, they break up into different groups. Each one converses with one or more of his neighbors on his right and left. We should, if we wish to speak to any one, avoid leaning upon the person who happens to be between. A gentleman ought not to lean upon the arm of a lady's chair, but he may, while standing, support himself by the back of it, in order to converse with the lady half turned towards him.

It would be extremely impolite to converse in a loud voice with any one upon private subjects, to make use of allegories and particular allusions which are understood only by the person with whom you are conversing and yourself. It would be equally out of place to converse in a foreign language, with any one who might be able to speak it.

It is not proper to withdraw in the midst of any conversation, but to wait until the subject in which you are engaged shall be finished; you then salute only the person with whom you have been talking, and depart without taking leave of any one, not even the gentleman and lady of the house.

The mind has need of recreations; it cannot be always occupied. Hence the custom of passing a few moments in those family and social parties, where we take part in the various amusements and games which have been invented to relax and divert the mind.

It is useless to observe here that we do not mean to speak of those scandalous establishments in which are frequently swallowed up the resources of families, and where a person, led by an unhappy passion, may consume in one evening, enough to furnish an annual support for fifty orphans; we design to speak only of those innocent games, in which we are ambitious only of the glory of a triumph. To propose to play a deep game would be to expose ourselves to contempt. For, those who composed the assembly, would imagine that he who makes this request, has no other object in view but to enrich himself at the expense of others, and that he is accustomed to frequent those abominable houses of which we have just spoken.

We should have a bad opinion of a player who, when he gained, should show excessive joy, and if he lost, should betray the least chagrin; for he ought to remember that it is only for amusement that he plays.

Conduct yourself without letting escape the least word of dissatisfaction, and be pleasant even if you are unfortunate.

When you leave off playing, converse with your adversary, and not seem to avoid him, but especially never speak to him of his good luck in playing, unless it be with a frank gaiety, for otherwise you would seem to be inspired with anger.

Play with fairness, and do not endeavor to see the hand of your adversary in order to profit by it; pay attention to your game, and not hold conversation with others. This inattention would render you necessarily insupportable to those who play with you.

If any play is contested, we should not discuss it with warmth, but refer to disinterested persons, explaining to them with calmness and politeness the point in dispute.

In playing, we must always preserve an even temper; neither should we devote too much time to it, for then this amusement would become irksome, and would soon be changed to a fatiguing occupation.

When the mistress of the house has prepared the tables for playing, she takes as many cards as each game requires players, and presents them to the persons present, beginning with the one whom she wishes especially to honor. To accept a card, is considered an engagement to play. The distribution of the players requires all the attention of the mistress of the house, for there are some persons not to be desired for partners. There are, besides, bad players, persons who being little accustomed to playing, stop a long time to think, bite their lips, strike their feet together under the table, drum upon the table with their fingers; pretend that such a person being near brings them bad luck, and request out of their turn to shuffle the cards, in order to change the luck, &c.

The mistress of the house experiences, besides the embarrassment of arranging these unlucky players, sufficient trouble in keeping from the same table, those who have any antipathy to one another.

When we commence playing, we salute, by an inclination of the head, the persons with whom we play, as we deal to them the first card. Gentlemen should collect the cards at the end of each hand, shuffle, and present them to the lady who is to deal.

We may, without impropriety, ask of any one if he plays such a game, even if he plays well; and we may ask those invited to play, whom they desire as partners. The most honorable set, namely, that in which the mistress of the house plays, can never be refused, unless we are unacquainted with playing.