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Part 74

The Book of Good Manners · Walter Cox Green — chapter 74 of 80 · ~695 words · public domain

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CARRIAGES. Carriages should be provided to take the bride and her family to the church and back to the house, and also the guests from the church to the receptions.

The expense is borne by the family of the bride, save for the carriage used by the groom, which takes him and the best man to the church, and later takes the married couple to the house, and after the reception, to the station.

CHOIR-BOYS. See CHOIR-BOYS AT WEDDINGS.

CONGRATULATIONS. Congratulations may be sent with letter of acceptance or declination of an invitation to a wedding to those sending the invitations. And if acquaintance with bride and groom warrant, a note of congratulations may be sent to them also.

Guests in personal conversation with the latter give best wishes to the bride and congratulations to the groom.

CHURCH. See BEST MAN--CHURCH. BRIDE--CHURCH. BRIDESMAIDS--CHURCH. GROOM--CHURCH. USHERS-CHURCH.

DANCES. It is not usual to have dances after the wedding.

DEPARTURE OF MARRIED COUPLE. See WEDDINGS--MARRIED COUPLE.

DRESS. See BEST MAN--DRESS. BRIDE--DRESS. GROOM-DRESS. WEDDINGS-GUESTS-DRESS, ETC.

EXPENSES. All the expenses are borne by the bride's family, except the fees for the license, clergyman, organist, and sexton. The wedding-ring, the carriages for the groom, ushers, best man, and the carriage which takes away the married couple, are also paid for by the groom.

He also furnishes souvenirs to the maid of honor and bridesmaids, best man and ushers, and all expenses of the wedding trip.

If the groom gives a farewell bachelor dinner, he bears all expenses.

FAREWELL BACHELOR DINNERS. See Groom- Farewell Dinner.

FAREWELL BRIDAL LUNCHEON. See Bride-- Farewell Luncheons.

FEES. The wedding fee, preferably gold or clean bills in sealed envelope, is given by the best man to the officiating clergyman. Custom leaves the amount to the groom, who should give at least five dollars or more, in proportion to his income and social position. The clergyman usually gives the fee to his wife.

FLOWER GIRLS. See Flower Girls.

FLOWERS are in general use. The quantity and quality of floral decorations must depend upon the taste and the wealth of the parties concerned.

BRIDE. The bride, if she desires, carries at the wedding ceremony a bouquet given by the groom. Flowers are sometimes dispensed with, and a Prayer-Book used.

CHURCH. In addition to the palms in the chancel, a string of flowers or white ribbons is stretched across the middle aisle, to reserve this place for the immediate family and specially invited guests.

USHERS. Boutonnieres, provided by the bride's family, should be given to the sexton by the florist on the wedding-day. They may be made of lilies of the valley, white roses, or the like.

Sometimes the ushers call at the house of the bride to have her fix them in the lapel of their coats.

GIFTS. The nearest members of each family should arrange among themselves what gifts to send, and thus avoid duplicates. Expensive presents are sent only by most intimate friends, and articles of utility by relatives or near friends. All gifts should be sent within two months of date of marriage, and should have thereon the woman's maiden name, initial cipher, or monogram, and should be acknowledged by the bride at the earliest moment, and not later than ten days after her marriage.

It is not in good taste to make an ostentatious display of the gifts, and if they are exhibited, the cards of the donors should be removed, and only intimate friends invited.

Those sending gifts should have the courtesy of an invitation to the wedding breakfast or reception.

If any gifts are sent to the groom, they should bear his initial.

A wedding invitation does not necessarily imply that a gift must be sent, as the sending of a gift is optional.

GROOM. See Groom.

GUESTS-BREAKFASTS OR RECEPTIONS. The invited guests leave the church for the bride's residence, and there are introduced by the ushers to the married couple and those standing up with them. If the guests are unknown to the ushers, they should give their names to one of them, who offers his left arm to the woman, while her escort follows and is introduced at the same time.

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