Part 22

6. PROTECT PURITY.--Teach your children to loathe impurity. Study the character of their playmates. Watch their books. Keep them from corruption at all cost. The groups of youth in the school and in society, and in business places, seed with improprieties of word and thought. Never relax your vigilance along this exposed border.

7. THREATEN THE LEAST POSSIBLE.--In family government threaten the least possible. Some parents rattle off their commands with penalties so profusely that there is a steady {78} roar of hostilities about the child's head. These threats are forgotten by the parent and unheeded by the child. All government is at an end.

8. DO NOT ENFORCE TOO MANY COMMANDS.--Leave a few things within the range of the child's knowledge that are not forbidden. Keep your word good, but do not have too much of it out to be redeemed.

9. PUNISH AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE.--Sometimes punishment is necessary, but the less it is resorted to the better.

10. NEVER PUNISH IN A PASSION.--Wrath only becomes cruelty. There is no moral power in it. When you seem to be angry you can do no good.

11. BRUTISH VIOLENCE ONLY MULTIPLIES OFFENDERS.--Striking and beating the body seldom reaches the soul. Fear and hatred beget rebellion.

12. PUNISH PRIVATELY.--Avoid punishments that break down self-respect. Striking the body produces shame and indignation. It is enough for the other children to know that discipline is being administered.

13. NEVER STOP SHORT OF SUCCESS.--When the child is not conquered the punishment has been worse than wasted. Reach the point where neither wrath nor sullenness remain. By firm persistency and persuasion require an open look of recognition and peace. It is only evil to stir up the devil unless he is cast out. Ordinarily one complete victory will last a child for a lifetime. But if the child relapses, repeat the dose with proper accompaniments.

14. DO NOT REQUIRE CHILDREN TO COMPLAIN OF THEMSELVES FOR PARDON.--It begets either sycophants or liars. It is the part of the government to detect offences. It reverses the order of matters to shirk this duty.

15. GRADE AUTHORITY UP TO LIBERTY.--The growing child must have experiments of freedom. Lead him gently into the family. Counsel with him. Let him plan as he can. By and by he has the confidence of courage without the danger of exposures.

16. RESPECT.--Parents must respect each other. Undermining either undermines both. Always govern in the spirit of love.

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CONVERSATION.

Some men are very entertaining for a first interview, but after that they are exhausted, and run out; on a second meeting we shall find them very flat and monotonous; like hand-organs, we have heard all their tunes.--COULTON.

He who sedulously attends, pointedly asks, calmly speaks, coolly answers, and ceases when he has no more to say, is in possession of some of the best requisites of man.--LAVATER.

Beauty is never so lovely as when adorned with the smile, and conversation never sits easier upon us than when we know and then discharge ourselves in a symphony of Laughter, which may not improperly be called the Chorus of Conversation.--STEELE.

The first ingredient in Conversation is Truth, the next Good Sense, the third Good Humor, and the fourth Wit.--SIR WILLIAM TEMPLE.

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Home Lessons in Conversation.

Say nothing unpleasant when it can be avoided.

Avoid satire and sarcasm.

Never repeat a word that was not intended for repetition.

Cultivate the supreme wisdom, which consists less in saying what ought to be said than in not saying what ought not to be said.

Often cultivate "flashes of silence."

It is the larger half of the conversation to listen well.

Listen to others patiently, especially the poor.

Sharp sayings are an evidence of low breeding.

Shun faultfindings and faultfinders.