Part 32

PERCIVAL. [patiently] Please try to get your mind clear, Mr Brown. I pointed out to you that you could not, as a gentleman, disparage a lady's character. You agree with me, I hope.

GUNNER. Yes: that sounds all right.

PERCIVAL. But youre also bound to tell the truth. Surely youll not deny that.

GUNNER. Who's denying it? I say nothing against it.

PERCIVAL. Of course not. Well, I ask you to tell the truth simply and unaffectedly. Did you witness any improper conduct on my part when you were in the bath?

GUNNER. No, sir.

JOHNNY. | Then what do you mean by saying that-- | HYPATIA. | Do you mean to say that I-- | BENTLEY. | Oh, you are a rotter. Youre afraid--

TARLETON. [rising] Stop. [Silence]. Leave it at that. Enough said. You keep quiet, Johnny. Mr Percival: youre whitewashed. So are you, Patsy. Honors are easy. Lets drop the subject. The next thing to do is to open a subscription to start this young man on a ranch in some far country thats accustomed to be in a disturbed state. He--

MRS TARLETON. Now stop joking the poor lad, John: I wont have it. Has been worried to death between you all. [To Gunner] Have you had your tea?

GUNNER. Tea? No: it's too early. I'm all right; only I had no dinner: I didnt think I'd want it. I didnt think I'd be alive.

MRS TARLETON. Oh, what a thing to say! You mustnt talk like that.

JOHNNY. Hes out of his mind. He thinks it's past dinner-time.

MRS TARLETON. Oh, youve no sense, Johnny. He calls his lunch his dinner, and has his tea at half-past six. Havnt you, dear?

GUNNER. [timidly] Hasnt everybody?

JOHNNY. [laughing] Well, by George, thats not bad.

MRS TARLETON. Now dont be rude, Johnny: you know I dont like it. [To Gunner] A cup of tea will pick you up.

GUNNER. I'd rather not. I'm all right.

TARLETON. [going to the sideboard] Here! try a mouthful of sloe gin.

GUNNER. No, thanks. I'm a teetotaler. I cant touch alcohol in any form.

TARLETON. Nonsense! This isnt alcohol. Sloe gin. Vegetarian, you know.

GUNNER. [hesitating] Is it a fruit beverage?

TARLETON. Of course it is. Fruit beverage. Here you are. [He gives him a glass of sloe gin].

GUNNER. [going to the sideboard] Thanks. [he begins to drink it confidently; but the first mouthful startles and almost chokes him]. It's rather hot.

TARLETON. Do you good. Dont be afraid of it.

MRS TARLETON. [going to him] Sip it, dear. Dont be in a hurry.

Gunner sips slowly, each sip making his eyes water.

JOHNNY. [coming forward into the place left vacant by Gunner's visit to the sideboard] Well, now that the gentleman has been attended to, I should like to know where we are. It may be a vulgar business habit; but I confess I like to know where I am.

TARLETON. I dont. Wherever you are, youre there anyhow. I tell you again, leave it at that.